AdAstrα wrote:I think that's the problem....I'm lonely. I don't know anyone in this city and no one knows me. I just want to be needed by someone...to love, and be loved in return. I feel unimportant and it's making me so miserable.
No point in dwelling on it now though...I need to sleep.
Yep... I know how it is.
I'm pretty sure the only thing that's ever kept me partially sane during those times was knowing that it's all an illusion, lol. Knowing lots of people doesn't make your life any more important, contrary to popular belief. It certainly seems that way at times, but it really isn't. It's all in our heads.
Being connected to others makes us think we're more important--and in a sense, it is true. It means you're important to the person or people you are connected to. But, you have to consider that in
reality, it's all a matter of perspective.
And besides, there are other ways to become "important." Nickola Tesla, an archetypical "mad scientist," spent most of his life in isolation. Oddly enough, his inventions and discoveries have impacted all of mankind as a whole. He's the reason why we have electricity in every modern home. He's part of the reason why we're able to have awesome things like computers, wireless communications, and the internet. Arguably, he's one of the most important people to ever have lived.
In addition, who is to say that you're not important to someone? Maybe you are, but you just don't know about it? You could have a very important impact on someone's life, and never even know it. It certainly isn't impossible.
In fact, even if that isn't true, you never know what could happen tomorrow, or in 5 years from now. Things are always changing... which means there is always an opportunity for new experiences.
Now that that's out of the way, it is important to recognize that
loneliness isn't caused by feeling unimportant. It's caused by isolation. The two are very different.
Social interaction always goes from a want to a
need at some point, no matter who you are. If I had to guess, that's probably what you're experiencing.
That
need for companionship is pretty stupid when you think about it, but it's also pretty stupid to live a life of isolation if it makes you miserable. And, of course, it makes anyone miserable. I could be wrong, but I don't think anyone actually wants to live without knowing anyone else.
Being lonely isn't something you can rationalize, and therefore the problem cannot be solved by thinking about it logically. No matter how much you try to remind yourself what I said above is true, it won't work.
You might be able to post on forums such as this, and that might help for a bit. You might be able to listen to the radio, watch something on TV, or read a book, and that can help as well. But, the problem is that it's all temporary.
Loneliness is persistent. It's always there.
Think of it as like a bucket with a hole at the bottom. Every time you interact with someone, you're pouring water into the bucket. Eventually, however, that water will always drain out. Unless you keep filling it, you are always going to find it empty, after a time. You can't neglect the bucket; you need to keep it filled.
Likewise, it is a basic human need to maintain contact with other people. The only thing that will ever solve the problem of loneliness is going out and talking to people. There is simply no way around that.
I know, I know, and I know. Believe me, I know. I don't particularly like doing it, either. Meeting new people is generally awkward, and unless you share the same interests, it can get very boring at times.
But it's always worth it.
TL;DR: Don't let being lonely get you down. Let it guide you on your journey to meet new people, have new experiences, and live your life to the fullest.
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Holy s***, why have I had such long posts today? What's wrong with me? My brain must be running on overdrive.
