Favorite TV Show Quotes

[Nitro]

Finn: I don't know what to do about Rachel...
Puck: Aw, come on, it's the city of Love! Go get her!
Sam: *mouth full with chips* I thought that was Paris...

Brittany: My cup, my cup, saying what's up to my cup! More a friend than a silly pup! My cup, my cup!
Tina: ...you're singing about...a cup?
Brittany: Yup!
Quinn: We need to get out of here.
Rachel: NO! Mr. Schue said we can't leave until we finish our songs!
Quinn: Well we aren't going to write them. We're going to have New York write them for us.
Rachel: But, but!
Quinn: Dwarf, we can't stay here! The only inspiration we have are matresses and bathroom cups!!!

[Lauren]

*ALF picks up the phone and makes a call on it*
ALF: "Hello, operator? This is an emergency. Give me the fire department, or the police, or the paramedics. Somebody! I don't care, you decide! ... Hello? Fire department? I need you to come out here. There is a giant cockroach trying to kill me! Alright then. I'm a cat and I'm stuck in a tree. Whatever it takes!"
*The bedroom door brakes down and ALF runs into the bathroom*
ALF: "Whoever built these doors plans on being horsewhipped. *Door noises* Occupied! Alright. The party's over. I have a 357 and I know how to use it! *Goes to the toilet and looks down at it* No one's ever told me where these things lead. Nah."
*Door begins to break open by the giant cockroach*
ALF: "Oh, you wanna use the bathroom? Is that it? Hey, I know the feeling!"
*Door breaks and the roach enters the bathroom, getting closer and closer to ALF*
ALF: "AHHHHHH!!! ... Whoa. You're angry at the world. I understand that. You probably didn't get enough love as a larva. Well, I got an idea. We can sit down, talk, and have a nice cold glass of boaric acid. You know we can deal with it. What do you think about that? Ever see one of theses?!"
*ALF tries to fight the roach with the toilet plunger but the roach breaks it*
ALF: "Joke. Joke! I was only kidding! You know what. I got the number of a nice psychiatrist. He, uhh, deals with psychical ants, and uhh, and roachs! Here, take this!"
*Starts to spray the roach with perfume in order to kill it*
ALF: "And you'll smell good too!"

ALF (episode: La Cucaracha)

[SBCharlene]

Patrick: * sniffs Junior and realizes his diaper is filled with you-know-what * Uh, SpongeBob? * fixing tie *
SpongeBob: Yes, Patrick?
Patrick: Kid's got a stinky.

May not be the best SpongeBob quote ever but I like how Patrick's expression is and the way he says it.

[Lauren]

^ Me too.

Spongebob: "I already filled this book with ideas. *Shows the book to Squidward* We should be able to finish by January."
Squidward: "FORGET THE BOOK!!! I spent the whole day with you doing all kinds of ridiculous things because you were supposed to explode!"
Spongebob: "You want me to explode?"
Squidward: "Yes! That's what I've been waiting for!"
Spongebob: "Okay, I'll try. *Begins to yell out so loud* GARY! YOU ARE GOING TO FINISH YOUR DESSERT AND YOU ARE GOING TO LIKE IT!!!" *Laughs* Now it's your turn."
Squidward: "THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT, YOU BARNACLE HEAD!!!"
Spongebob: "Ooh. Good one."
Squidward: "NO! You are supposed to explode into a million pieces!"
Spongebob: "Why would I do that?"
Squidward: "Because the pie you ate was a bomb!"
Spongebob: "What pie?"

Spongebob Squarepants (episode: Dying for Pie)

[SBCharlene]

Idk if I already put this here before but xP

SpongeBob: Hey, flipping is not as easy as it sounds!
* Patrick flips a rock over with his foot *
Patrick: Tssssss...
SpongeBob: Why don't you go home, Patrick? You can compete in the Laying Under a Rock All Day Games.
Patrick: Well, at least I don't polish my fingernails.
SpongeBob: * gasp * You take that back!
Patrick: Fingernails, fingernails, fingernails!
SpongeBob: You don't even have fingernails.
Patrick: I cannot believe what I am hearing!
SpongeBob: How can you hear it? You don't have ears either.
Patrick: Uh ... holes! Holes!
SpongeBob: Cone head!
Patrick: Yellow!
SpongeBob: Pink!

[Lauren]

^ You did put that one already.

[KopsTheTerminator]

Cartman: Concerned citizens, I thank you for coming. I know that you are all deeply troubled and want to find a quick and painful way to get rid of Scott Tenorman once and for all!
Clyde: Who's Scott Tenorman?
Kids: Yeah.
Kyle: Scott Tenorman is an eighth grader who sold Cartman his pubes for ten dollars, and now Cartman's all pissed off.
Cartman: Sixteen dollars and twelve cents! He is a disease. He is a cold calculating mind, and I will have revenge!
Butters: Wuh what are you gonna do?
Cartman: Did you guys see that movie Hannibal? Where the deformed guy trained giants pigs to eat his enemy alive?? Well, if we find a pony, we can train it. Train it... to bite off Scott Tenorman's (censored)! It will be painful and humiliating! Everyone will see it happen! And then, Scott Tenorman will forever be known as the kid who had his (censored) bitten off by a pony!!! WAHAHAHAHAA!!!
Kyle: What's in it for us?
Cartman: What?
Stan: Yeah, why should we all care about getting Scott Tenorman back for you?
Cartman: Oh, right. Why should we care? Yes, why should we care? Indeed, eh. Let's just let Scott Tenorman walk away with my sixteen dollars and twelve cents. Hell, let's let all the Scott Tenormans of the world take what's ours and laugh in our faces. Why stand up for yourselves when you can just walk out of here right now and say, "It's not your problem." But... years from now, when you're old and have children of your own, what would you give to come back and fight this one day? This one day, when you could have made a difference! Where you could have told Scott Tenorman, "You may take our pride, but you'll never take MY GODDAMNED SIXTEEN DOLLARS AND TWELVE CENTS!!

-South Park, Scott Tenorman Must Die

[SBCharlene]

Patrick: Knowledge can never replace friendship.

[Lauren]

Kate: "ALF, you're always imagining things. Do you remember the time you thought Mr. Litwack was building an atomic bomb in his basement?"
ALF: "It was an atomic bomb!"
Willie: "It was a pool heater."
ALF: "Ha! They don't even own a pool!"
Kate: "Yes, they do."
ALF: "They do? Can we go over?"

ALF (episode: Lookin' Through The Windows)

[SBCharlene]

SpongeBob: Ripped pants à la mode! * rip *