Unnamed

Unnamed

Postby Kopalover » June 17th, 2011, 3:34 am

The first Chapter is small. I'll write SO MUCH in the second chapter. I promise! <3




Spoiler: show
Chapter One:
A new cub was born, in a dark cave. Deep in the Pridelands, which were now known as the Shadowlands. Not any ordinary cub, his name was Mheetu. A bright white cub, with moss green eyes. His mother Sarafina, worried about his health. Not all cubs were born white, without a reason. Sometimes it's a sign from the Great Kings, other times it's because of their health.

****

Mheetu was on the tip of Priderock, watching his mother and the rest of the Pride trying to hunt the sickly animals. In the distance, he could see the green trees and bushes behind the mountains. Running away would mean instant death. Nobody left the Pridelands, nobody but the Hyena's searching for food.

He was still a cub, soon to reach adolescents. The hair tuft on his head was a off tan, and hung over his left eye. His eyes turned from mossy green, to eletric green. He was the only one in the Pride who didn't know who his father was. Everyone could tell by the eyes. Scar, had the same eyes.
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Re: Unnamed

Postby TheLionQueen » June 17th, 2011, 5:14 am

I like it so far good job you got me hooked from the first sentence! :D Can't wait to read more :)
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Re: Unnamed

Postby DGFone » June 17th, 2011, 5:19 am

It looks very good so far! :)
My only complaint is that it's short: but you already know that. Can't wait for Chapter 2!
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Re: Unnamed

Postby Kopalover » June 17th, 2011, 9:02 pm

Thank you! It means a lot ! :)

Yeah, I had ten minutes to write. I had the idea of a Mheetu Story. So I just had to. :3
I'll make Chapter 2 longer :3
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Re: Unnamed

Postby Kopalover » June 19th, 2011, 4:29 am

CHAPTAA TWOOO !!!!!


Spoiler: show
It was dark, the residents of the Shadowlands have just gone to rest. One young lion, just reaching his adolescent years was still awake, Mheetu. Watching over his mother, so no Hyenas would enter and kill. It was a every night ritual of his. Every night he would walk in circles outside the den and watch over the remaining lions and lionesses. Ussually, nobody desturbed him, tonight was different.

A lion, with a dark brown pelt watched over him from above. His green eyes glowing in the moon light. The lion wanted Mheetu, wanted him for his own reasons. To be king. Hopping of the ledge, the lion came closer to Mheetu.

"Ahh, Mheetu. What are you doing this fine night." Asked the lion, with a sly grin spread across his face. Mheetu turned and looked at the dark lion and rolled his eyes.

"Nothing, Scar. Just watching over the Pride." Answering, Mheetu turned and kept walking in circles. Scar smiled, knowing Mheetu would give in to the offer.

"Young Mheetu, for ages I've been watching you grow. I have something to confess." Scar said putting on a poker face. Mheetu turned, and looked at him weird, as it to say 'What..?'. With a smile, Scar continued. "You're my son." Scar said, looking at the ground.

"How!" Mheetu yelled, yet not loud enough to wake any Pride Members. Looking Scar dead straight in the eye, he squinted. Knowing what happened.

"You know the process, every king needs an heir." He laughed, turning away from Mheetu and walking away. Mheetu frowned, he wanted to scream and yell. He hated Scar.

Mheetu had enough of his nightly routine, he turned and walked into the den. Looking at his mother, and knowing the pain she went through. Having to raise the son of an evil king. Laying beside his mother, he closed him eyes. All he could see was his mother, talking to Scar. Suddenly, in his 'dream', Scar smiled an evil grin. The grin he used when something went his way.

****

Just outside of the shadowlands, a tan almost adolescent lioness walk the plains with her family. Searching for the opening to the lovely area known as the "PrideLands". Apparently, they were the most lush lands in Africa. The food was plentiful and the dens were warm.

Little did they know, the Pridelands were now the Shadowlands. The food left along with the colour green. Grey inhabited the Pridelands now. Those so called 'warm dens' were now ice cold. Yet, these lions had no clue what went on. They heard from other Pride about the Pridelands, and they wanted to come after their Pride split up.

"Mother, do you know where the Pride lands are?" The tan lioness asked, looking to the taller more dark lioness with wide eyes. Their feet ached after walking for many moons, they had to be their soon.

"Oh Sierra. Probably just a few more hours, or maybe moons." Her mother sighed, looked at the bright moon above them. Noticing a fallen tree, that had a small den under it. "C'mon Children. We can sleep in their." She sighed, jogging towards the den with her young son and daughter.



Didja enjoy it ? :)
I don't know if it's too short or not. Please let me know if you want more! :D
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Re: Unnamed

Postby KingKovu44 » June 19th, 2011, 4:30 am

How did I miss this before? Nice work.
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Re: Unnamed

Postby Kopalover » June 19th, 2011, 4:47 am

Thank you ! :)
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Re: Unnamed

Postby KingKovu44 » June 19th, 2011, 4:48 am

You're welcome, my friend and fellow writer.
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I'm also the #1 fan of Tigress from KFP, Gia the jaguar from Madagascar 3 and adult Nala from TLK!

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