Favorite TV Show Quotes

[Lauren]

Just like "Favorite Movie Quotes" but this time, TV edition!

"Oh! My heart! Oh, the bacon! I think I'm having an...episode!" - Josh (Drake and Josh)

[Daenerys]

"AHHAHAHAHAHAHA!! IT'S A GIRAFFE!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!" Patrick Star, (Spongebob Squarepants.)

[FlipMode]

Robert -Ma! Dad got into the ham!
Marie - Oh no! What did he do?
Robert - He's lopping up slices of it and putting them in the toaster... Like pork pop tarts.

[Lauren]

"So why do they call it New Jersey if they never had a plain old Jersey?" - Drake
"I don't know. I wasn't at the meeting." - Josh
(Drake and Josh)
I've always wondered about this too.

[KopsTheTerminator]

This quote may be offensive to some people so I put it in the spoiler tag. You have been warned.

Spoiler: show

Jared: Ladies and gentlemen, a- at first I didn't understand why you felt betrayed by the fact that my aides helped me to lose weight, but now I understand that it isn't fair that- I had aides and most of you don't. And so, with all the money I've made from commercials, I have decided to start the Aides for Everyone Foundation!
Crowd: *stare, thinking he's talking about AIDS*
Jimbo: WHAT?!
Jared: I am going to personally see to it that each and every one of you gets aides!
Crowd: *more staring*
Mayor McDaniels: This guys' insane.
Jared: But I won't stop there. I'm gonna seek out all the underprivileged and hungry children of the world, and I'm giong to give them aides myself!
Chef: You're gonna give children AIDS?!
Jared: Yes, it is my hope that every beautiful child on this earth has aides by next month! Aides for everyone!!

-South Park, "Jared has Aides"

Best misunderstanding ever.

[Eli_Ayase]

"Onions in the peas? What the hell?!" - Homer Simpson from The Simpsons

[SBCharlene]

SpongeBob: [in the shape of Texas] Hey, Patrick! What am I now?
Patrick: Uh, stupid?
SpongeBob: No, I'm Texas!
Patrick: What's the difference?
[Both laugh]
- Spongebob Squarepants, Texas

[Azerane]

"When I try to deceive, I myself have more nervous ticks than a Lyme disease research facility..."

I love that quote. Big Bang Theory

[SBCharlene]

Sandy: I'M HOTTER THAN A HICKORY SMOKED SAUSAGE.
- Spongebob Squarepants, Pre-Hibernation Week

[Taylor]

Steve Urkel: Did I do that?
-Family Matters