Remorse for the Deed {Poem by cub Simba's perspective}

[xLilacVixenx]

Rising high, coming low,
The sun sets, that's all we know.
My life had turned upside down,
My heritage without a crown.
Though my heart had disgrace and remorse,
My terrible trouble had run it's course.
I must be brave, against my fears,
To fight these continuing, growing tears.

The sun had set, the sky was blue,
Nala stayed by my side, I wish it were true,
Though all good things must come to an end,
And new beginnings around the bend.
The good things, in truth, were actually bad,
These have left me nothing but sad.
My friend had left, glancing back,
I felt my heart shatter in one crack.
Now I face my punishment bold,
Though no honor I do hold.


-----------------------------------------

My short poem I wrote from Simba's perspective when he walks home with Nala to face his punishment. Truth be told, it's one of the poems I didn't really like, but I hope it was enjoyable to you all. The sentances grew kind of long and I had to repeat them to myself several times to make sure it sounded okay, so please let me know if it got kind of long. As always, constructive criticism is welcome.

[Arani]

That was amazing! LOVED IT!!! Keep it up, Vixey! ^_^

[Timba]

hahaaa was good Vix! more more! ;P

[dariusgib]

i Loved this but i was a bit confused
WHere was it supposed to be was it Simba after Mufasas death

[xLilacVixenx]

Aww, you all are too sweet! *Hugs all* ^^

[quote="Dariusgib"]i Loved this but i was a bit confused
WHere was it supposed to be was it Simba after Mufasas death
[/quote]

[quote="xLilacVixenx"]My short poem I wrote from Simba's perspective when he walks home with Nala to face his punishment. Truth be told, it's one of the poems I didn't really like, but I hope it was enjoyable to you all. The sentances grew kind of long and I had to repeat them to myself several times to make sure it sounded okay, so please let me know if it got kind of long. As always, constructive criticism is welcome. [/quote]

[K0PA]

that was cool Keep it up