Trust

[YFWE]

Thanks a lot, Ral! You're too kind!

[Mike]

Your story gives me blue balls.

<3

[YFWE]

I'm not 100 percent sure what you mean by that but if it's what I think it means, YOU'RE WELCOME! >:3

[axx1000]

Well it was definitly worth you sacrificing your education for this!

The good: Very interesting begining, it shines a beautiful black light over all the chaos that is unfolding throughout the piece, you put it together like a pro and you expressed alot of feelings flawlessly. It was a very great poem overall.

The not so great: Kovu just cant fully pull off the chriminal mastermind act as you were precieving him to be (basicly all these strong emotions were overall a lie isnt convincible)

[YFWE]

Haha, you're very much correct on that; everything having been a lie would involve the reader having to suspend a LOT of disbelief given what we all know about Kovu's character and the events of the series. I think those are stories I do like doing, though... doing things that may not make a whole lot of sense canon-wise, but are (hopefully) enjoyable enough if you suspend prior notions for long enough to get through it in its entirety. You're absolutely right though; in a normal, canonized universe, everything being a lie would not make much sense, unless Kovu was a supremely good actor. I don't expect everyone to follow and agree with that, so it's no big deal. Thanks so much for the feedback, good and not so good, and for reading! It's a breath of fresh air to hear something not a hundred percent positive like most are around here for any fanfic. Keep doing what you're doing. ^^

[axx1000]

Well im not sure you exactly get what i was saying, what i went to say was that, it would have been better if you refired to past events and tought about them as a lie. (before i read this i quickly though about the whole movie then began reading it) for example if Kovu was thinking back to when he was stairing up at the stairs he might have thought something like "What a fool Kiara was in trusting me, back when we were looking up at the stairs, i thought for sure she would have caught on to my act, i had to think about, me torturing simba just to get a laugh out, and me pushing her off a ledge just for me to be in a good mood, What fools they were, to trust me." Stuff like that to make us contradict what we thought about them during that scene.

And yes i did just think about this response a week and a half later.

[YFWE]

Haha, I know what you mean. I dunno, personally I would never want to do it that way. Don't want to give the reader ALL of the story. I tend to be extremely minimalist in stories like this and try to be as vague as possible, at least up to the very end. Letting the readers think of things like that themselves instead of leading them to it.

But that's just how I like to do things! Others will obviously think and do different. That's what's great about storywriting; there's so many different methods. Some work for some and not for others. No worries!

[axx1000]

Well i can still say that it was worth you sacrificing your knowledge that day during class for us

[Superdoglac]

I like the idea of Kovu faking everything all along. Made it very dark and intriguing. Too bad it's a oneshot, I DON'T LIKE USING MY IMAGINATION!

Awesome work Kevin. I missed reading your fics.

[YFWE]

Thaaaaaaaaank you Veronika! <3 I missed you readin' em! cccc:

And IMAGINATION IS GOOD!



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