What are you thinking RIGHT NOW?

[linnea]

I'm still down

[Gemini]

Post removed.

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I don't even know what I'm doing half the time anymore. Why do I even bother? Why do I care so much about anything?

[Regulus]

^ If there's one thing I've learned in life, it's that relationships never really work out, no matter how promising they seem. Best not even to try for them.

But yeah, don't worry too much about it. I've never really known anyone who actually stuck around with the same person, it doesn't really happen.

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I don't even know what I'm doing half the time anymore. Why do I even bother? Why do I care so much about anything?

I agree with you on a lot of things, but this isn't one of them. If you go backand re-read this, I'm sure you'll realize just how utterly pessimistic it is. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy and you know it.

No, relationships don't always work out. Some do, and some don't. The ones that start before you're 20, and especially before you're 18, have the highest chance of failing. With maturity, that chance diminishes as you learn more about yourself and your interactions with others. Experience with relationships, turns out, helps one to maintain relationships later in life.

You can't look at just a handful of relationships from people close to you and declare that a statistical sample. Most people go through many relationships before they find the right one. But, here's the thing: do you know *why* people do find the right one? Because they keep looking. They don't give up after their first failed relationship. If you say, "That's it, I'm done, it's not worth it," then you're effectively giving up any chance of a working relationship at all. Go ahead and tell me I'm being preachy, but what you should be doing is the opposite.

Go ahead, try. It's not going to be perfect, and things may or may not work out in the end. If they don't, then you come out of it with experience and hopefully some drop of wisdom. If they do work out, then you'll be glad you tried.

[Gemini]

Post removed.

[Woeler]

^ If there's one thing I've learned in life, it's that relationships never really work out, no matter how promising they seem. Best not even to try for them.

But yeah, don't worry too much about it. I've never really known anyone who actually stuck around with the same person, it doesn't really happen.

Giving up is the only sure way to fail.

[KopsTheTerminator]

I'd say something but I admit being given "logical" advice when you're hurting badly just doesn't help as much as it should and it's really not my area to say anything relevant anyway. Meh.

I do generally agree with Regulus and Woeler though. 18 is far too early to begin thinking something is impossible just from experiences, especially relationships which require maturity that comes with time and relationship experience.

[Regulus]

... Yeah, I guess I know that. In theory I suppose they do. I've just never seen it firsthand, really. (And I am also including people much older than 20 in my sample size).

Maybe all my friends and family just have horrible luck with relationships. I don't really know. I just feel like everyone I've ever seen get into a relationship does everything right and does everything they're supposed to but then all of a sudden the people still break up randomly, often for seemingly no reason and with no real warning.

Maybe I'll have it in me to try again one day. I dunno. But my expectations are pretty low, if I'm honest with myself. Like, I know what you're saying is right, but that's just not how I feel right now.

Sorry for bringing all of you down. I don't know what's wrong with me.

I get it. Yes, it sucks to be dumped. It's awful. And it hurts... I don't think there's any way around that. I'm not suggesting that there is.

But no matter how bad it is... you can't let that bring down your view of the bigger picture. You can't let your bad experience(s) take away your hope. This isn't about bringing anyone else down. This is about you. You can't let your pain bring you down--that's a much worse place to be and you don't want to go there.

[Gemini]

Thank you, everyone. I really appreciate it. I'm feeling somewhat better now, I guess.

Probably gonna call it a night for this site, I think, but hopefully I'll feel better and more like myself tomorrow. I'm really not normally this much of a downer and I don't like being that way, either. But thanks for your understanding.

[linnea]

I just need a hug

[Chavratheserval]

^I wanna give linnea a hug, and tons of luck and hope!