TheBlueQueen wrote:Sounds rough. I hope that isn't the case for me. I do admit I am worried life won't be much better for me as I get older. I guess I just have to take my chances and try to accept what comes.
It probably won't be. Or at least I hope not. I really don't think anything could be worse than high school for me. I would have had to really hit rock bottom for that to sound better than anything in my future.
I wasn't really able to fully accept myself and stop caring until about 12th grade. And oddly enough, that's the first time in my life that I was able to get really close friends and be respected by the people around me, probably due to being more confident. I've become even moreso since coming to college, and it's like suddenly all that past doesn't make the slightest bit of difference anymore. Which is nice, tbh. I didn't really fit in either, and before my last year or so of high school people thought I was weird and ugly (and then, during my depression phase, that changed to sad, so nobody really talked to me, and I didn't talk to anyone else). I was lucky if any of my acquaintances/sort-of friends could be bothered to spend any time with me, for the most part.
Here in college, the campus is way too large for everyone to possibly know everyone or even be in a class together for long enough to really get to know one another so there's not a lot of pointless drama. People don't really go out of their way to be dicks. They just kinda live and let live. You find your friend group and like the other people you live with are friendly, but... IDK. It's not the same. Like I said, there's really no incentive or reason for people to be dicks to random people they don't know at college. There's no real set of 'popular' kids and then everyone else, at least as far as I know. Probably because the network of people that one knows is different for everyone. There's no constant frame of reference.
Even in regards to sororities and fraternities, which the movies always show as being like the center for all cool kids who don't care about anything else and are flaming dicks... honestly, if they are flaming dicks, I wouldn't know. I'm not close friends with any of them and like I said, there's no need to interact a whole bunch with people outside your friend group if you don't want, most of the time. And tbh, the one girl I do know who is in a sorority actually seems really nice. She laughs at my jokes, in any case, and doesn't seem fake, and gets along with my friends on this floor, so... that's about the only prerequisite for me to get along with you. lol
I mean, 35,000 people go to this school. That's almost twice the population of the entire town that I left. Thank God.
Tora wrote:I guess you're right. Tonight's been a winner for me... How are you guys?
Doing fine. Randomly went to Sacramento today with a friend.
I get on the bus for free since I'm a UCD student.
So I can really go whenever, provided I have time.
Now I have to study, though. lol