Are online friends 'real' friends?

[ScarsLove]

This question has racked my brain before. I don't have many friends to hang out with irl but I do have plenty of online friends. I had someone tell me that online friends can't be 'real/true' friends. I beg to differ. My one I met on FF.net, we both had deviantArt accounts and we both love fanfiction so we would talk every so often then all the time. One day we swapped Facebook accounts and then some time later phone numbers. We've been talking for over a year and a half and we plan on meeting up sometime in the summer ( supervised of course )

What's your opinion?

[UncoordinatedPisces]

I definitely think online friends can be true friends. Especially if you end up meeting, then you know it's real. I have invited Buffy and Frida to come over when I'm 16 (details yet to be set lol) but I can see it happening. My mother knows about them of course, and she likes the idea of them staying at mine for a while.

But anyway, back to the question, the only difference you really have is that you can't make physical contact. And that doesn't really matter (I do love a good real life cuddle tho <3). If you talk to them verbally or see them over Skype, and if you know they can be trusted and they trust you, then I don't see why it can't be called a real/true friendship.

[Regulus]

I'm basically going to reiterate what I said before:

Friendship is based primarily off of trust, and trust requires time to form.

On the internet, nobody knows who you really are. But isn't real life the same way? How do you know that guy behind you isn't a serial killer?

It's all about time. If you've known someone for a few years, it's easy to get a good idea of what the person is like, and how they act in various situations. It's at that point where, if the person was a cereal killer, you probably would have found out one way or another.

Why are online friends any different? They're not. The only difference is that the person isn't physically there.

Personally, I think it's pretty shallow to need to meet someone in person before considering them a friend, although it is understandable, simply because judging people based on appearance alone is hard wired into our brains.

On the internet, nobody knows I'm actually a sweaty 30 year-old homeless man stealing Wi-Fi from an internet cafe in Taiwanistan.

Obviously, if you know me, you know I lied there, but what if I actually was that man? Would your opinion of me change? I bet it would.

The question is: should it? Do you really need to know the superficial things about a person to consider them a friend? Why do we define ourselves so heavily based on our appearance, but not our character?

It's what's on the inside that counts. What better way is there to reveal what's on the inside, than behind the cover of anonymity that is the internet? If someone is a jerk, I'll bet it will take less than 5 minutes to figure that out in an online text chat. Most people aren't brave enough to admit their true feelings in real life, so face to face conversation actually gives more false ideas, in that sense.

[Kitva Hyperlink]

Eh hmm... I am going to have to say no. You can't trust people that much online. They can come and kidnap you if your not careful. But still I find it great to have online freinds that want to talk about the topics you like. ^^

[Si-Amber]

I think you can have real friends online. I've had online friends who have been as caring and reliable as ones I know in person. Some have even gone on to be great IRL friends. I even met my best friend online.

I've met quite a few online friends in person (Shadowfax was the first ) and none have turned out to be kidnappers, murderers, etc. You just have to be sensible and meet them in public places until you know them better and obviously make sure your parents know if you're under 18.

[Woeler]

You can have online friends and real friends. The difference is quite big. I say an online friend becomes real friend once you meet. For me it would be impossible to value a person over the Internet more than a person I actually know.

Real friendship involves more than just talking.

[Scars Mate]

[quote="Woeler"]You can have online friends and real friends. The difference is quite big. I say an online friend becomes real friend once you meet. For me it would be impossible to value a person over the Internet more than a person I actually know.

Real friendship involves more than just talking.[/quote]
Mhm.

[UncoordinatedPisces]

[quote="Woeler"]
Real friendship involves more than just talking.[/quote]

How so? Do you really need physical contact? As much as I love a hug, it's not that important. I mean, you can talk verbally and see each other over Skype...when you do that it does take it to a whole new level, but still, I don't think you have to meet them for them to be true.

[InsaneSeagull]

I think it is possible to have real friends on the internet. It does take longer to really meet a person but it is possible. I mean, why would real contact be so important for you to trust someone? As someone mentioned, you can't be really sure what's hidden behind even your first neighbor if we think that way. But, if you chat to someone quite often and soon start talking to him about almost everything... he can become much closer to you than any other "real" friend. Not everything is in physical contact.

[Si-Amber]

[quote="AmyMarie"][quote="Woeler"]
Real friendship involves more than just talking.[/quote]

How so? Do you really need physical contact? As much as I love a hug, it's not that important. I mean, you can talk verbally and see each other over Skype...when you do that it does take it to a whole new level, but still, I don't think you have to meet them for them to be true.[/quote]

I agree. There have been times in my past where I felt so alone apart from friends on the internet who were always there for me. Yeah it's great if you finally meet, but you don't need that to be real friends.

Also everyone defines friendship differently.