Regulus wrote:I did this twice last year... in the afternoon at the end of July, and just after sunset on New Year's eve. Now, I've done it again today.
The time we had together was so amazing. It's difficult to express just how grateful I am to have had a vacation like this. Yet, every time... the days I have to say goodbye to her are the worst. It always ends up with this overwhelming sense of emptiness. It's like drowning in a sea of some kind of melancholic... stuff. It's enveloping me in this sadness I can't escape.
I thought this time would be easier, since I should be used to it by now. But it's not. She takes off her seatbelt, opens the door, and stands up. I pop the trunk open for her, so she can get the luggage out of the back. As she closes the door and walks around the back, all I can think is that I forgot to say I love her. It feels like it lasts forever, but it's probably not even a minute. Eventually I hear her close it, and I see her step onto the sidewalk. She stops, looks back, and waves at me. The door is closed, but I can hear her say bye. It's not what I wanted to hear, but I wave back.
Her flight is in two hours. She's going back home, but I... well, I have to go to work today. No beach to frolic on, no pool to swim in, no museums to visit, no castles to explore or nature walks to go on... oh no. Today I go back to the usual, and I go back tired, sad, and alone.
And as I return 'home' this afternoon, I see the empty bottles and bag of chips from last night. I look back in my car, and I see the brochures from the places we went to, and the sandy beach toys we'd played with. I look at my desk and I see the rock I collected from last summer's vacation, and the figurines she gave me last Christmas. This is my life. She's back to being a thousand miles away, but even when she's not here, the impact she has on my life is a hundred levels deep.
It took weeks to adjust back to my ordinary life after the last couple times I saw her. It's time to do that again. I don't want to, but... I'll see her again. Someday. We're not breaking up, and she's not dying; she's just going home. It's just until next time.
Just seeing this now. Wish you all the best, dude. I felt this way once about someone and while it didn't work out in the end I get how much that can hurt. Stay positive, I'm sure you'll find a way to close the distance one day. /3
UncoordinatedPisces wrote:Popped back in to see any chat about the 'new' film, still haven't seen it yet though. Man, I used to spend so many hours here aha.
Relatable tbh.
I really hope I didn't get tetanus from that rusty cart at work that gave me a nasty scrape. My last Tetanus shot that I can remember, was 7 years ago. >.> I may of had one 2 years ago when I went back to public school but I can't remember 100%. I remember getting two vaccines but can't remember for sure which ones they were lol. 
Oh thank goodness! Thanks Regulus.