My Lion King Forum

So I'm taking a poetry class and figured I'd share a bit. Love to hear you guys' feedback!



[quote]LETTER


You look so sweet there,
Smaller and smaller
As distance grows.

I wish maybe I had kept you
For a sunny day, so I could pause a moment,
Smell the daffodils, or stray the gray path for green
Greet neighbors, make merry small talk
That never goes anywhere.

That was before neighbors were strangers
And our thoughts turned from pastures to
Matters needless and so very sterile
So very important.

But I know that everyone lets go
Well, not exactly, some of us let go
Others have it wrenched from them
Wailing and crying and then stony faced
Stoic, how things are supposed to be
For grown ups like us.[/quote]


and


[quote]
SHELTER

Seek shelter, storm’s a coming
Snow, snow, everywhere
Red sky and black clouds
Red rain on black tar

White clouds over green grass
Plumes of nirvana
Transitory, fleeting
Back so soon, so soon

Face blue
Eyes bloodshot
Yellow
Sinking through the floor

Grey rain on tired granite
Drumming on a black dress
Black suit jacket, black hat
Black shoes, white handkerchief[/quote]


Thanks for reading!

cool
your a really good poet.

This is a little different from Aley's poetry exchange, that's why I called it a review swap instead.

nice