My Lion King Forum

I haven’t made a topic in this area before, but today something happened and I just need to vent about it!
Before I start, I need to say that I haven’t got a good relationship with my father... I wouldn’t say we have a relationship at all, we live in the same house, yet we never speak to eachother. Let’s just say he’s been.. unkind.
I have a great relationship with my mother though.

Anyway, what happened was this:

I had spent two and a half hours cleaning and tidying the house: vacuuming, washing, I even cleaned the stove! I was just finishing decorating for Christmas and hanging up Christmas curtains when my parents came home. My mother was very happy about everything I had done, and she praised me. My father on the other hand, completly ignored all my efforts, only noticing that the cord/wire for the star that hangs in each of our livingroom windows had fallen down. (It happened when I hung up the curtains.) After hanging it back into place himself, my father sat down to watch TV, only to complain about how the box of christmas stuff I had placed on the table was blocking his view.
My mother tried to hush at him, compensating by repeating over and over how clever I was and how cozy and nice I had made the livingroom look.

I know this is petty stuff compared to what other MLK-members are going through, but I just needed to get this out. I hate how extremely negative my father is about EVERYTHING, and I hate how I let his bad mood effect me. I have never understood what my mother (who is a very cheerful and sweet person) sees in him.

Anyway, thanks for listening/reading. It feels so good to just write this down instead of having all these angry feelings and thoughts whirling inside me.

I'm sorry to heard that father is ignoring you, you father should really put attention of the nice things that you have done,

Aww that stinks Solle! I have to admint I never had a very good relationship with my father either. You did the right thing just keeping silent. Even though your father may be a jerk, jerks are like that. They don't want to say good things about people very often. Your mother is a kind person. I'm sure that you made Christmas a whole lot better, even for your dad because I'm sure he is very proud of you in the inside. I'm so sorry this happened! I hope you feel better soon!

I'm very sorry to hear that this had to happen, Solle. I can relate to this a lot, except it was in my mother's position. Anyway, people who complain, just want people to do something for them, and they don't have anything better to do. In your father's case, if the Christmas decorations were really bothering him, I think he would of gotten up on his own, moved them and said in a nice and mature way asking you not to put them in a place where he cannot see the TV. But instead he chose to just sit there, and complain. Most who complain try to pick out the littlest, even the tinest flaws out of everything. The wise ones, such as you and your mother, did the right thing and didn't say anything. It's best just to ignore them, and hell, LET them complain. Even if they are doing it constantly. It may seem annoying at first, and you might give in, but once you have practice with these things you will stay nice and calm. ^^ If anything happends again, like your father complains the best words to say are, "Okay" and "I'm sorry". If you do, it isn't feeding the situation, and after a while the person who is complaining will get bored, because you aren't reacting to their complaints. When you say those words, they might even just find one thing that ticks you off, but the best thing is to ignore what they say. ^^

Sorry for the long message. Hope this helps. ^^

lol SM said it all. Just basically ignore him and he'll get tired of picking at your tiny flaws. It's good that at least your mom appreciated what you did. Even if the decorations did irritate your dad, he shouldn't have yelled like that because you were only doing it to make him happy.

Thanks, all of you. Your advice and support really helps and makes me feel better.
I do ignore my father most of the time, I know it wont do any good to argue or complain back, lol.
Thanks again for listening, it means a lot to me. *hugs*

It's nothing Solle. We're all friends here and we're always there for each other. ^^

No problem, Solle. ^^ Your pride is always here for ya.

No prob Solle! ^^ Me luvs you! *huggles back*

No problems Sole! I am new but as a fellow TLK nutter i shall always look out for others such as yourself!