(T) Shadows of the Moonlight - Excerpt and Synopsis

(T) Shadows of the Moonlight - Excerpt and Synopsis

Postby Kina » July 27th, 2010, 2:48 am

Synopsis


Unrest coils around the savannah like a lethal adder, waiting for the proper moment to strike. Long grasses wave underneath the moon and sun as the winds of change trickle through prides, laying path for new paws to walk upon. Differences are behind every gaze, fragments of the past piercing the future. Kindness and loyalty mean everything when deception and betrayal run nigh, even as the Circle of Life marches on. Little is as it seems, whether in or out of Prides. Blood will spatter the night; Breaking some bonds of trust, and strengthening others. In the midst of brewing strife, a new seed of hope beginning to grow. Softening years of hardened ways, perhaps. It is becoming painfully clear, however, that naught is achieved without trials and tribulation. For when one has been fuasted into the dark, they truly appreciate the light. Allowing much to happen, under the shadows of the moonlight.


Excerpt


A gentle breeze drifted over the savannah grasses, rustling them as a dark figure wove through. Lavender streaking across the coming morning sky allowed the dusky lioness to blend with her surroundings, Kina’s russet paws silently padding across the soft dirt as she walked. Crystal blue eyes were locked on a straggling wildebeest, the pangs in her stomach reminding her of the time since she’d last eaten. Still favoring her left forepaw from her encounter with the Hamaki Pride, though. The lioness slowly moved forward in a focused prowl, ears perked forward. A small nick was visibly missing from the top of her right ear in the faint light, but did not deter her hearing any — Tracking the sounds of their split hooves on the grass and dirt, for once ignoring the slashed bark of a tree as she passed. She’d get her meal and get out, rather than risk meeting an unwelcoming scout so soon.

The feminine rouge slowly inhaled as her prey halted to graze, dark claws kneading the ground as they extended. Soft dirt shifted under her paws, slowly dipping into a low crouch. She lunged. Bounding down the short slope in one smooth motion, immediately springing up again as soon as her paws touched the ground. The herd’s heads jerked up — Bolting as her claws dug into the straggler’s back, it snorting in pain as it tried to buck her off. Curled horns swung at Kina, knocking the wind out of her as the blunt edges connected with the weakened lioness. Gasping for air, she launched forward as her claws slipped — Wet warmth pouring into her mouth like a bittersweet spring as Kina’s strong jaws closed around its throat. Snapping the neck and jugulars at the same time.

She released her grip when it collapsed, wincing as she landed on her already tender paw. Pleased that the wildebeest had felt nothing but her claws, though. Instant death was merciful, rather than drawing it out. Kina’s tail twitched as she stood once more, hooked black nose rising into the air as a gentle breeze blew past. Her dark muzzle curled back in dislike as the scent grew stronger. Hyena.

The russet lioness immediately crouched, jaws fastening into the carcasses’s throat as she dragged it back towards the tree. A small cloud of dust followed it, leaving a thin crimson trial as well. However, the canine scent was already becoming overpowering. Mangy poachers. Kina released her meal not far from the marker, her contrastingly bright eyes hardening. Rippling muscle underneath her rich pelt coiling in anticipation, ears flattening against her head in annoyance as a pack of hyenas sauntered into view. Kina’s tail slowly swished to and fro as the alpha female moved to the front of the pack, claws once more digging into the dirt. “Leave,” she hissed, venom dripping from her tone.

The packs tongues simply lolled out of their mouths as they waited for their leader to take charge, panting loudly. Their ribs noticeably jutted out, raggedly spotted pelts not hiding their conditions. Prey was running thin for them all. They were half starved. And there were quite a few, almost a dozen. All of them admittedly looking a little pathetic, though. “Heh … Lions. You’re not in the best of shape either, kitty cat. What makes you think you can win against all of us?” the alpha growled, a lazy drawl accompanying her tone. Her scraggly pack fanning out as she spoke.

Kina bristled at the threat, a feline snarl curling through the morning air. Any pity she held for them was becoming fleeting. “Prey first goes to the huntress, then the scavengers. You know all too well how things work — Your pack may have the leftovers,” the lioness returned levelly, claws extending once more to emphasis her statement. She had trespassed in order to eat for the first time in a week, only to have her natural nemesis saunter in and attempt to steal it. Needless to say, the lioness was less than pleased.

“No — You leave,” the alpha spat, hackles rising as a steady growl met their ears.

Kina’s eyes narrowed, her once leisurely swishing tail now twitching at the almost onyx tuft. Weighing her options. The scavengers were underweight and smaller than her, but also had her vastly outnumbered. If she retreated, she’d go unscathed for the day. The end result would only make her weaker with hunger, thus more difficult to make a kill later. Just because the male hyenas tended to lack intelligence, though, did not mean their leader did. And the last alpha she’d encountered was outright vicious.

Weight suddenly slammed into Kina’s ribs. The hyenas rammed into her again, head butting her with surprising strength. Stifling a gasp of pain, she immediately lashed out in attack. A sharp yelp came from one as her open paw slapped across its head, knocking the spotted dog away. Becoming a umber and beige whirlwind of pain as they repeated charged against her already battered body, resounding barks and yelping following by natural consequences. Strong jaws suddenly snapped at her throat. Kina jerked back, flinching as another collided with her already aching foreleg. Baring her teeth as she retreated a step, several of the hyenas hesitating upon seeing her still bloodied fangs. But only briefly.

Raw hunger drove them on, half crazed with the instinct to survive. The russet lioness reared back on her hindpaws as another lunged at her throat, a swift paw knocking the boney dog back. Agony suddenly tore into her once more — Teeth closing on her shoulder blades. Kina twisted, attempting to bat the spotted canine off her back as more pounced. Her strong jaws tore into the male’s side, before jerking him to the ground.

Only to have sharp fangs did into her throat. Fresh anguish slowly spreading down her dusky pelt in a scarlet swath. Denying her of air, the jaw lock unrelenting. Kina staggered as the others rammed into her with a full force head butt, overwhelmed by sheer numbers. The offending grip tightening when she attempt to shake the alpha off, digging her claws into the female’s shoulders. Wet blood met her pads, but futilely. Her chest burned, begging for breath.

The lioness slowly succumbed; previous weariness and her situation combined proving too much … Too many opponents, and too little energy to defend herself with. Her paws wavered underneath her as scarlet dripped onto he dirt, Kina’s crystal blue eyes slowly falling closed with the dawn light. Surrendering to the merciful depths of unconsciousness, her world going dark.

* * * * *

Patrolling the boarders usually proved interesting, many still testing his reign, but this morning was decidedly dull. Mradi and Neema had successfully taken down two wildebeest of the herd that had gone stampeding by, but little else had happened. Amri padded along the thin dirt trail that was walked daily, his dark claws gouging into the earth every time he took a step. Dawn light danced off of his burnished gold pelt, the male’s slender muscle rippling underneath his fine pelt. The morning breeze toyed with his dark onyx mane as he walked, carrying fresh scents with the old.

Amri paused, an ear twitching. The familiar scent of hyena reached him, causing distaste to flare in his viridian green eyes. “Pathetic mutts … Even they cannot be that stupid,” he growled under his breath, shaking his head as he set off at a lope. His long stride covered the distance quickly, large paws nearly soundless. One would think that after moons of trespassing and the results, though, that they’d not return.

Long grass rustled as the golden and onyx lion trotted through, set on his goal. Involuntarily slowing some, however, when the bittersweet scent of blood slammed into this senses. Not just prey blood, either. It seemed mixed, overpowering. Amri paused, one paw partially off the ground as he attempted to sort the different scents. The musky stench of wildebeest was almost as overpowering as the hyena, blood aside. His teeth bared slightly, before continuing. When his paws did meet the dirt path again, the rumbling growl tore into a rock-shattering roar at the sight that greeted him.

Scarlet drenched the ground, life’s blood staining and freely flowing onto it. Several spotted hyena’s yelped in response, jerking back from a wildebeest — And a lioness’s prone form. Crimson matted the entire pack’s muzzles. The alpha’s lips curled back, moving away from the fallen lioness when the golden and onyx lion advanced. “Not only do you invade my territory again, you attack another of my kind? Rogue or not, you are treading across a crocodiles back. Your kind is not welcome here,” Amri spat, glaring fangs at the pack. His claws fully sliding out as he stroke forward — An open pawed slap sending the unexpecting alpha rolling along the dirt, a fresh addition of open wounds across her face adding to the collection of scars.

The entire pack was in tatters, though. Claw and fang marks were scattered across all of them, no doubt from the rogue’s influence. That did not cause his glower to falter when the pack’s leader rose to her feet. “You shall get what is yours, my ”˜King’,” the hyena said quietly, tone chilled.

“Is that a threat?”

“A promise.”

“So be it … Now leave, before you cross the last line,”
Amri returned, equally quiet. His stance far from lacking in threat, though. He received one last glare before the pack turned tail and bounded off, vanishing past his boarders and into the long grasses that faded out but a league away. He turned after a moment, padding over to the rogue. Their promise held no water at the moment, thus giving him time to continue strengthening his pride. Sticky dirt clung to his dark pads when he halted, observing her.

Ribs were beginning to show, suggesting that she had come from the Barren Lands further out. Bite marks marred her otherwise well groomed russet pelt, one having just missed her jugulars whilst many others were scattered across her back and legs. His paw slid underneath the lioness’s jaw after a moment, guiding her head out before lowering into a crouch. Much to his surprise, a raggedly weak breath brushed by his ear. Barely there, but audible nonetheless. It seemed that despite being half suffocated, she had a will to live. While it would’ve been so simple to end the trespassing rogue’s life had he been in the mood to kill, rare pity struck him in the face. Providing the bleeding stopped, she would live. If the rogue was like the others that had chosen to join him, there would be opportunity as well.
Last edited by Kina on October 17th, 2010, 2:50 am, edited 3 times in total.
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Re: Shadows of the Moonlight - Excerpt and Synopsis

Postby Azdgari » July 27th, 2010, 3:47 am

Now that's what I'm talking about.
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Re: Shadows of the Moonlight - Excerpt and Synopsis

Postby Kina » July 27th, 2010, 5:17 pm

*Chuckles.* Thanks, Az. I'm glad that you like it. ^_^

Now I just need to finish making up my cast of characters, and decide where to actually start SotM. ^_^"
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Re: Shadows of the Moonlight - Excerpt and Synopsis

Postby Azdgari » July 27th, 2010, 5:42 pm

Can't wait, Kina. It's shaping up to be pretty impressive. =D
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Re: (T) Shadows of the Moonlight - Excerpt and Synopsis

Postby Kina » July 27th, 2010, 6:46 pm

*Purrs.* Well, my total cast will currently amount to 19 characters, and I have 7 left to create I think. I'd have to check my stack of CSs. Hopefully SotM will live up to your expectations as well. ;)
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Re: (T) Shadows of the Moonlight - Excerpt and Synopsis

Postby Arani » July 27th, 2010, 7:29 pm

Great job! Can't wait for more! :D
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Re: (T) Shadows of the Moonlight - Excerpt and Synopsis

Postby Kina » July 27th, 2010, 7:57 pm

Thanks, Arani. Believe it or not, SotM is my first ever LK fanfiction. ^_^
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Re: (T) Shadows of the Moonlight - Excerpt and Synopsis

Postby Eli_Ayase » July 30th, 2010, 9:40 am

great FanFiction Kina :D
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Re: (T) Shadows of the Moonlight - Excerpt and Synopsis

Postby Kina » July 31st, 2010, 5:57 pm

Hehe, thanks, Natalie. I'm glad you like what I've written so far, even if it's not much.
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Re: (T) Shadows of the Moonlight - Excerpt and Synopsis

Postby xLilacVixenx » October 17th, 2010, 10:20 am

One word; amazing. The synopsis had me already hooked and as I read further on, the detail and delicacy of the story captured me. To begin with, I admire how you describe at every angle possible so you are assured your reader has the picture in their mind, without over-doing the detail to such an extent it's ridiculous. As I said before, you have a delicacy in your description and detail; a certain feeling that can overpower you and change your feelings throughout the story as if you were the character.

The description to how the way the world works and moves is stunning as well. Take this sentence for instance:


Kina wrote:Long grasses wave underneath the moon and sun as the winds of change trickle through prides, laying path for new paws to walk upon.

You seem to have an understanding for Lion King history, don't you? ;) The image in this sentence is quite clear in my mind; I can imagine a long path with golden rays shinging down upon it with little grains of dust sprinkling through the sunlight, but only in the sun. (And I have no idea why, but I feel I should speak to you about detail in this comment, lol)

Another thing is you have a certain logical and sophisticated writing style that can make your stories sound like it came out of the script from National Geographic. :P Blood is also one of my favorite things in stories. I have no idea why, but it upsets me when there is no detail put into for blood; take for instance Call of the Wild. It mentions how the thrill of 'taking the prey into my jaws with the warm, red liquid pouring down my mouth' is amazing. You really captured that feel and I appreciate that.

In conclusion, your story was fabulous and I would definately rate it a 10/10 stars. *Claps paws* ^_^
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