Circle of Life series Episode One Search For Kopa

[dariusgib]

Hi guys i have written the appendixes of a series im plannig which i can do till next year so until then ive decied to post episode 1 please do not steal it, and can you after reading it and the note on the bottom comment and like thank you


(Message shown a lion king fan made film. Please use your imagination as we could not provide animals for acting)

Scene 1 Pride rock



(Over a rainy field)

William of Canterbury/narrator: it had been the rainy season when the invasion had begun. When the clouds rained with tears of despair.

(Inside or outside pride rock)



Simba; I went through with your wedding but now I’m looking for him. The person you drove away.



Kiara; Father I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.



Simba; He’s still gone. My son who I’ve waited for nearly ten years and you drove him away.



Nala; Father I’m sorry.



Simba; It doesn’t bring Kopa back.

(Nala comes in)

Nala; Simba. He’ll come back



Simba; No Nala. Not unless I look for him.(runs off)



Nala; Simba come back.



Kiara; Don’t worry mother he’ll come back.



Nalla; Not if he kills himself. Stay here. I’ll go after Simba.



Kiara; But



Nala; Stay here Kiara that’s an order (runs off Kovu comes in)



Kovu; She’s right. We’ve only just got married. We don’t need to get into another scrap



Kiara; I guess so.

Scene2 jungle



Zazu; Ahh my day off and it’s great. (creature is seen in the distance)



Marley/ either as a voice or as a person; Hello Zazu



Zazu; Marley, but your dead.



Marley; I am one with nature. I can communicate through nature. I did not complete my task because of my death. You must be Simba’s guardian on his adventure.



Zazu; Where?



Marley; Across the savannah you will find him. Looking for his son. Kopa.



Zazu; (looks down) but I don’t understand (looks up) how are yo- (Marley has disappeared.



Zazu; I guess my day off has been cancelled.

Scene 3 (savannah)



Simba; Kopa (Zazu comes)



Zazu; Well, running from the royal bride seems quite improper.



Simba; I’ve got to find Kopa. I don’t want to drags others into it though. This shortcut was so secret I didn’t even tell Nalla.



Zazu; I know you probably have objections to me being with you but its going to take more than a rhinoceros to separate me from you this time.



Simba; You’re not my guardian. Marley was bu--. You’ve taken his place.



Zazu; A wish from the dead. Which even your kingly power can’t break.



Simba; Come with me. You have proven yourself worthy.



Zazu; Yes. Let’s find your son.



Simba; I always wondered as a royal servant have you got any ssongs to entertain your king.



Zazu; Sigh. I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts.



Scene 4 (savannah)



Nala; Simba. Simba where are you (Banzi comes)



Banzai; Strange whats the queen doing all on her own.



Nala; Banzai. The hyenas all left what are you doing here.



Banzai; To install a foothold. With your capture.



Nala; What you talking about I could rip you to pieces.



Banzai; Well you see. Theres more of us. (more hyenas come)



Banzai; I’d come quietly.



Nala; You were never this organised. What’s happened to you.



Banzai; The pride rock curse is has been lifted. The hyenas intelligence has returned and the hyena empire again with it’s shining emperor.

Nala; What in God’s name are you talking about.



Banzai; You’ll see.(Nalla goes with them) (Reth is seen on a vantage point)



Reth; This can’t be good

Scene 5 (council room)



Karma; If Kopa does return the outlands crisis can be put to rest.



Jeudas; we’re really going to listen to this striped fool. Kopa might not return therefore we must force Vitani to rule the outlanders.



Karma; Striped fool. I’m the not the horned pessimist swine.



Tama; Could you please just shut up. (they shut up) Thank you.(Reth enters)



Reth; Nala’s been kidnapped. The hyenas are organised. Built an empire. Pride rock curse. (Tama takes a disturbing interest)



Jeudas; What. Slow down.



Reth; The hyenas have kidnapped Nala. Banzai claimed that a pride rock curse was broken. The hyenas intelligence was unlocked. They’ve formed an empire.



Karma; Go scout the area. See where their base is.



Reth; Yes sir.



Karma; And also where is your brother Zazu.



Reth; He went to find Kopa.



Karma;(quick under his breath) Is the whole kingdom looking for Kopa go find where Nala is.



Hornbill; Yes sir(leaves)



Karma; meeting closed.



Tama: Thank Mufasa

Scene 6 (Savannah)



Kopa; I can’t go back. I’m not wanted (Kiara appears)



Kopa; Oh baby sister have you come to love me again.



Kiara; No who would love you. You’re dead to me.



Kopa; No! This can’t be happening(Simba appears)

Simba; Kiara what have I told you about talking to strangers.



Kopa; I’m not a stranger. I’m your son.



Simba; Not any more. (walks away with Kiara)



Kopa; No! (Simba and Kiara disappear)



Kopa; I want to go home.

Scene 7 (savannah)



Zazu; Sire there he is.



Simba; Kopa (runs to him)



Kopa; Father.



Simba; Don’t worry. I’m here.

Scene 8 (savannah)



Reth; There still moving but strange wheres Ban--- (Banzai chokes him)



Banzai; Why I’m right here friend. Go to your king and tell him to meet me at kings centre. Go!.(Reth leaves)



Banzai; Long live the empire.

Scene9 (savannah) (hornbill comes to Simba, Zazu and Kopa.



Zazu; Reth, what are you doing here.



Reth; Long story. Simba you must meet Banzai at kings centre now.



Simba; The hyena. Why?



Reth; It’s about your wife.



Simba; Nala



Scene 10 (kings centre)



Simba; What do you want Banzai.



Banzai; I wanted to talk about the state of your kingdom. You see the pride rock line is just a relic. Soon to be put in the museum of expansion. The hyena empire request you’re surrender.



Simba; Why would we surrender to scum like you.



Banzai; Because you’re wife will suffer the consequences.



Simba; What’s happened to you.



Banzai; Why not ask you innocent Rafiki. You have three days to answer are request. Then you will have to be eradicated. (walks away)



Simba;Not while I breath.

Notes

For people who view this this is not a theatre preduction and I will not use a obsessive amount of puppets to not make it stupid also the rash ness of Kopas departing and Marley a new character entrance is not a mistake but a plot idea so that viewers will watch the episodes more to find out more about why Kopa left and who Marley is. Also adding plot suspense and drama to it as well. I will give more of a interface of how the pridelands and outlands are run and how christainanty will be introduced in episodes. Also you will learn about more characters I’ve created such as Msalti. Savonarola Arson. Judas de Pazzi and Reth all of there traits are hidden in clues of the names.

Tip look some of them up on wikiepedia or ask what they mean in Swahili

Thank you and please support

[KopsTheTerminator]

k

[dariusgib]

what do mean by k do you mean ok just asking

[SuperBabySimba]

Ok, so first of all maybe you should first introduce your new characters at least a little bit. This way this makes no sense at all and probably won't hold the audience's attention for long because there's no clear picture of anything or anyone to be formed; All it raises is more and more questions that don't get an answer and we follow characters we have no emotional bond with whatsoever or even any idea what or who they are and where they came from.

Also:
- What's with Kiara and Kopa's relationshiop? There should be some indication to why she drove him away and when exactly did it happen.
- And was that one bit Kopa's dream? Where the hell has he been all the time and how long has he been gone? For the ten years Simba talked aboit?
- If Simba has waited for Kopa for 10 years he (Simba) should be pretty much dead or very, very old and decripit by now. You do realize he was at least 5-years old in the end of TLK and would in your story be at least 16 years old and lions rarely live much longer than that while they're old age begins from the age of ten.
- And if Simba really wanted to find Kopa, wouldn't he have everyone he could possibly get to search for him instead of going alone and secretly?

And what in the world is "pride rock curse" keeping the hyenas intelligence locked up? Sounds pretty supernatural and out of the blue element that would probably need something more to really work instead of sounding rather silly. (:

[Panda-chan]

[quote="dariusgib"]what do mean by k do you mean ok just asking[/quote]
LOL

[theLioness]

Why isn't Shenzi the one initializing everything instead of Banzai? Shenzi's the leader. Females in hyena clans are the dominant gender and take charge of everything.

Since we don't know many of these characters you've created, please place their species by their name or give a description.

And finally, I had a lot of trouble following this story and understanding what exactly was going on. I encourage you to keep at it, but definitely work on describing settings and actions, okay?

[dariusgib]

Ok thank you for the replies i apreciate some of the comments alot now ill try to answer alot of the question ok
1. Shenzi is not the influential one because later on in the story it reveailes she dies in child birth of Banzais son yet again im sorry that i didnt put this information in as i said before i wanted to work at being vague making the audience interested
2. The years im sorry about because i thought a lions life span would be 40 not about 13 yet again im sorry also your question about where hes been im was still writing that when you commented im still not sure
3.Kopas and Kiara realtioship which caused him to run away again i wanted to be yet again vague to make audience interested all you get is it was Kiara fault and Kovu was involved some way.
4.Pride rock curse i can honeslty agree with what you say i was trying to make it believable and still have a good story i will happily take a suggestion
5.The character genders and species Judas's and Karma's are hinted in the insults they recieve Karma striped fool a zebra. I will understand horned pesssimt swine didnt obviously point at gazeele im sorry. As for marley my first idea was a baby elephant but thats changing even now
6.Action descriptions yet again im sorry for i just thought since i woud be acting this and part directing this i would kind of get the idea out also i thought by putting actions in i would make it cheeesy
7. Introuduceing character bonds i wanted to do this but not sure how to do this without going of course in whats going on yet again i will recieve suggestions. Also there is a bit of character bonding with Judas de Pazzi and Karma de Medici they clearly do not agree and Zazu knows Marley all the rest though i will admit there was no indication. I will admit this is a bit of a rough i just wanted to get the message across that why i added notes
I thank you for reading and using your valuble time thank you

[SuperBabySimba]

But how can a BABY elephant not to mention a little hornbill bird be a grown up lion's guardian? There is absolutely nothing such little animals could do to protect a grown up lion. Zazu failed even with two little cubs. And how exactly did he prove himself worthy in that bit wherein Simba says he had?

[dariusgib]

you have a very valid point but as i said the idea is changing marley was meant not really as a guardian but more as a tutor i had planned marley to be Rafikis apprentice who gets execcuted by Scar for speaking out aganist him byt i get your point and im not totally sure how to answer this

[dariusgib]

Has any one got any suggestion theyd like to take forward