Reprimand/Advice/Suggestion/Request Etiquette

[SnowyCheetah]

I'm really hoping the staff will offer their opinions on this issue.

In the past, if someone has done something wrong that they can fix, I typically tell them about it (trying to be polite about it) so they can fix it before a staff member has to step in and issue official reprimands or warnings and stuff. Most members appreciate it, since I've saved them a visit from the staff (and on the side, saved the staff some time by helping resolve the issue before it requires their attention). But recently, two members very strongly resented my comments and advice, even though it was polite. One member had a sig element which stretched the pages of the forum horizontally (Im pretty sure the sig rules have provisions for that) and I told him that his sig was stretching the page, and even offered to look up the sig rules for him and tell him what size was acceptable. He took care of his sig, but made no secret that he deeply resented my input and would rather have had me tell a staff member if I had a beef with him.

I also told another member, whose post broke the USR, that their post had stuff in it that shouldn't be there, and that they should take care of it. In that case, I probably saved them a warning, but they resented my presence to an enormous extent and made no secret of it.

So my question is, should I (and others like me, who occasionally inform other members about things they need to fix) just stop telling people, and tell the staff instead? If we can take care of the issue without involving the staff and using valuable time from the staff's day, shouldn't we try?

Also, is it my fault that these members got upset at me, and do I need to just stop trying to help out, or are they being unreasonable?

Please, please offer your opinions, MLK staff! As well as everyone else, of course.

[KiarasMate]

While I'm sure your intentions were sincere enough Snowy, it all depends on who you're trying to help, and in what method you go about doing that. For some people, if you openly point out something they've done wrong so that other's can see their mistake, such as posting in the thread directly, it might make them feel as though that you're trying to belittle them rather then help save them from perhaps getting a future PM or warning from the staff. While this is a noble cause, I would have to say that it would be in your best interest to let the staff handle things. It will save you having to deal with situations like you've dealt with recently and won't make you look as though you're trying to do the job of the MLK Staff, even if that's not your intention. If you feel strong enough that someone has done something that goes against the rules of MLK, just use the report feature and let the staff deal with it. Like I said, I know that you're just trying to help people out in the end but in the long run, things are just better left in the hands of the staff. This is just my opinion though. ^^

[SnowyCheetah]

Thanks, KM, I appreciate your opinion. Like I told the first person I mentioned, I'll use the report button from now on

[FlipMode]

I wouldn't worry about it, it's just that some people get offended quickly/easily if you disagree with them. Everyone has an opinion, and some people's opinion is that no one but them should have an opinion, be totally cool with that.
Also some people will look at that as backseat modding (Google it if you haven't heard of it) which is genarally frowned upon.

[SnowyCheetah]

Yeah... Not really trying to be a mod at all... But I guess they took it that way regardless.

[WildSimba]

I honestly think it depends on the situation. If you see some drama happening in the chatroom/a thread, and a staff member isn't on to help with it, then I think that is a mature thing to do, just to tell them to calm down, and take the arquement somewhere else.

But I think these slight things like signatures and spam can be handeled by just the Mods. There are certain rules set within these warnings like signatures for example, they give the offender 2 weeks upon which they notice the signature offense or something along those lines, and then they delete it themselves and give you a warning, I believe.

But I'll echo now what KM said, and just leave the mods to it. They do their job good, believe it or not.

[YFWE]

I think there are certain members (or just types of people) that a normal member such as yourself could influence if you politely told 'em that they had done something adverse, but generally, just let the staff handle it; that is their job, after all. Chances are they can handle whatever the issue better than we could. I always just alert a moderator if something's amiss, be it an oversized signature or a disturbance in the chatroom. Sometimes it might seem nice to try to help out, but the staff here is fully capable of handling everything themselves; there's no need for any of us to take matters into our own hands. Just shoot 'em a PM, add 'em on MSN... do whatever you feel like doing, but just tell the staff. Things are a bit easier that way.

[Moka]

I agree with KM. Members should report questionable things so that mods can have the final say.

Like FlipMode said, some people may call what you did "back-seat moderating", but I think you were just trying to help out. Personally I think the other members may have seen it as a command instead of friendly advice (although I don't know the details).

And I agree with WS. While most issues should be passed along to the staff, members can do a great deal of good by trying to calm arguments. Either way, all issues should be reported.

Members aren't taking time from us by reporting it. That's what we're here for, we like getting reports, we're trained for it and we know exactly what to say.

Edit: what YFWE said. lol.

[KiarasMate]

[quote="Moka"]we like getting reports,[/quote]

lol. Yes, we do but only if need be or if the situation warrants such actions, right? ^^

*doesn't want a sudden influx of reports to flood in just to make the staff happy*

[Moka]

Lol, I'm reporting you for that!
No, but yeah...I spoke for myself there. I like getting reports